Author Topic: How About Poetry???  (Read 594905 times)

Kitty Offline be

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Antw:How About Poetry???
« Reply #3405 on: September 29, 2020, 12:26:13 »
It's hard to accept love has died on its way
I had a strong believe that it could never fall apart
waking up, knowing the knife stabbed too hard this time
I thought you would be forever by my side
I guess I loved the calmness you created
to lay down in your arms unaware of the cruels in life
yet this time I know I'll wake up all alone in my nightmare.

It's hard to accept friendship lasts only as long as it takes
it takes to build up and it breaks down in nothingness
waking up, strolling through memorylane  of your heart touching mine
I thought we'd be forever one team pushing further to grow
I guess I loved the softness of your voice
carressing a bleeding soul to get up and move on
yet this time I'm afraid, I'll wake up in no time, without you by my side.

It's hard to accept what we had was crushed underneath
all the obstacles gathering, no more time wasted memories
waking up, tearful hurt crushed my heart, kept inside
I thought silence would grow out and time would guide
I guess I trusted too much upon your radiant soul
sending light enrolled melodies around
yet this time, I wake up by myself, it's too late.
Chose being kind over being right, always!

egonSchiele Offline 00

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Antw:How About Poetry???
« Reply #3406 on: September 29, 2020, 12:42:01 »
***
I let the fog
Stream and swirl
Into my warm soul

Let it be cold
Let my heart cool
Down
Let my face be bitten
By the frost
Let the tears
Freeze
Let me be lost
In the mist

I grieve
I see what you don't want to see
Blame me
I'm used to
Being blamed
For feeling hurt

I let the wind
Scream and scowl
Breaking the shawl
Of my messed up hair
Into wavy strands

Your hand doesn't touch it anyway

Only loneliness can be safely predicted
Is it what sets aside true love from a trauma bond?
Is it me despairing before it's all done?
Or is it me hearing my own pain
In my own heart?

So many things I shared
I regret their heaviness
I mouth into the fog that I love you
Even though I see your lips forming other words
Instead

I let the fog
Stream and swirl
Into my warm soul

Let it be cold
Let my heart cool
Down
Let my face be bitten
By the frost
Let the tears
Freeze
Let me be lost
In the mist

Let me disappear
So you breathe with ease
If this is
What you want
I'm used to
Freeing up space
To be occupied by those
Who would be loved

I never asked to be born
To those who couldn't love me
I was searching for a warm home
In the ways I could
I was looking for love
How I were taught love could look

I let the cold wind take my soul
Maybe, I'm not human after all
A sea creature, a fanthom
You can treat me mercilessly
Water does not hurt
Isn't supposed to
Feel hurt
Shouldn't want
A kind word
The warmth of a caressing hand
Shouldn't want
To feel loved
Shouldn't expect
To be informed
Of anything
Shouldn't have
Her worries
Dissipate

But what if
I am just
A human?

What if
I'm just a
Lost traumatized woman?

What if
I just
Want to love and be loved?
When things go bad -- do something good.

egonSchiele Offline 00

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Antw:How About Poetry???
« Reply #3407 on: October 02, 2020, 12:17:53 »
***
Step into the fire,
Burn


Will I swirl up
In a cloud of ashes?

Ashes to ashes
Dust to dust


I wanted to believe
In your words
I wanted to trust
It was love

I step into the fire
To burn

Like a witch
Blameless, too

That little girl
She is standing there
Begging
Love me
Hug me
Notice me


Everyone says you love me
You yourself hurt me if I dare
Saying
How lonely I feel

I step into the fire
To burn
Let the flame lick away
The nerves off my skeleton

Numb like ice
It's a river you cannot cross twice

Be with me
I only wanted someone
To be with me
But I chose them
After you
Mom
Dad

Unavoidable error
Inescapable hell
To want to get close to those who
Really want to be
On their own

I can see it now
I cry my heart out
I can see it now

I can see it now
So I step into the fire
Alone
When things go bad -- do something good.

Kitty Offline be

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Antw:How About Poetry???
« Reply #3408 on: October 06, 2020, 13:15:11 »
Fog bewitches my heart
the colorful happiness driven out
maybe it's autumn
grey mood for grey days
we both know it isn't
something inside me broke
long before I was aware I was someone
I don't know how to get out
grasping every hand that tries to pull me
yet never strong enough to hold on
you guided me a long way
your eyes made me awake
something inside me lit up the day we met
recognition from a former life
gone with a snap
what we built in years broke down in seconds
what matters is gone
what I feared came true
what got broken never healed
seconds got minutes into years
and in my heart I know
you let go off me.

Chose being kind over being right, always!

egonSchiele Offline 00

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Antw:How About Poetry???
« Reply #3409 on: October 06, 2020, 14:20:27 »
***
Stories
Of falling leaves
Are being told
In sweet whisperings
Of October wind

Each step I take
In whichever direction
Propels me
Forward in time

Stories
Of colorful droplets
Splash
Into puddles
On the grey
Asphalt

Time moves
In one breath with
The flitting birds
In the trembling sky
Of Autumn
When things go bad -- do something good.

egonSchiele Offline 00

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Antw:How About Poetry???
« Reply #3410 on: October 18, 2020, 20:00:39 »
***
Looking at myself
I wonder

Could I be
Someone else
Could I be to them
Those I wanted to love
What they wanted to love?

To love as to be with
Not to love as to feel
The joy of the feeling

To love as in walk together
Through the good and the bad
Not to wait till I get
How to make them happy

To love as to compose
The dance of events
Into a joined jump
Into the shared future
Not as a dream to dream
When there's no one else
To fall in love with

Looking at myself
I wonder
If I could bear
Enhancing myself
In specific ways
Would I be able to make them change
How they were to me?

I must acquiesce
Succumb to reality
Dance
Through the pain
Do
What I was born to

Looking at myself
I wonder
Was there really anything
Was there any hope at all

Could I become
Someone else
Could I read their thoughts
Could I create ideal worlds
For them

To soothe their pain
To calm my heartache

I wish I could recompense
Erase the pain they had
That made them hide away
Into their cold shells

But don't I wish it
So they could love
Love me as I were and am?

Looking at myself
I wonder
Was there really anything
Was there any hope at all

Or was it all chosen
Before I came
Into being
When things go bad -- do something good.

egonSchiele Offline 00

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Antw:How About Poetry???
« Reply #3411 on: October 20, 2020, 08:57:59 »
***
And I want to talk with you
But I stop myself
You wouldn't hear me
And, worse, later I might hear
My words in a different voice

And it wouldn't be just me
Who would hear them colored
In the way you read them

As if what I tell you
Can be broadcast
As if it is right
As if I don't mind
But of course, it's not true

Maybe for you
All that's given to you
You want to give to others
So maybe happened to my love
All that I wanted to give
Became gifts to others
If it fed you somehow
But I shouldn't go there
Shouldn't think of it
Because of the hurt
It all brings

Don't speak to me you loved me
Don't tell me you wanted the same things
I don't know what you wanted
I needed you near
I wanted to hear
Your voice
Talking back to me
In a simple dialogue
Not about love
About any other thing
But it isn't me
Not this reality
That you are
Truly loving

This is how I see
How it all ends
Within me
I don't want to
I want to stay
I want to believe
You didn't give away
My love
I want to forget
To have this love reborn
But it all
Is hoping against hope

And I want to talk with you
But I stop myself
You wouldn't hear me
And, worse, later I might hear
My words in a different voice
When things go bad -- do something good.

egonSchiele Offline 00

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Antw:How About Poetry???
« Reply #3412 on: October 23, 2020, 09:18:55 »
***
Don't think of the bad thing
Don't panic


Why do my hard questions
Make you believe I'm emotional
About them? You see what's not there
I guess you see your own fear

Don't think of the bad thing
Isn't it childish?
How does thinking and being concerned
Bring around misery?
It only strips away sweet delusions
And wishful thinking

Because Death always lurks
Behind every curtain
If you don't know, you lose
What you wanted to save
Death comes anyway
It isn't bad
She doesn't split
Things into right or bad
She just is

I don't think of Her always
But She is my greatest friend
My motivational speaker
Enforcing me to grow in my strength
To face the world at its best
And its worst

We need fantasy, we need
To escape the brutal reality
But the reality isn't only brutal
It gives sweetness as nothing else does
If you keep hiding from what's true
You lose everything, sometimes at once

Death is also a nepenthe
Sweet oblivion from the suffering
There's no shame in being scared
Of what is to come
But there's only one ultimate truth
In this world
That all that is born
Will meet with Death

Don't think of the bad thing
Don't panic


I don't panic, I only think
I don't even need to think much
There's nothing to ruminate
About; Death scares me no more than
A jump into an open sea
From a vessel far from any shore:
The transition is scary
What is to come is not to be known
The safety rope is there
But it also might not work
As my Jewish ancestors put it
There's no sense to discuss
What lies beyond human life
Death just happens; another station
Awaits, or maybe not;

So my questions are
There to make the future
Safety ropes more robust
To save from the open sea those who
Were thrown there with no knowledge
How to swim
But even a good swimmer
Can't catch up with their boat
When the waves are strong
So I'm always concerned
With things being clear
And of giving and needing
Support

We must think of the bad thing
The bad thing isn't bad in itself
But it's bad for us while we're here
Nobody would think of it
If not us
When you don't take care of things
They can't last

Don't think of the bad thing

Don't hide from the bad thing
Call it by its name, don't call it bad
Bad is a childspeak
Don't hide from the bad feeling
Give it a name, live it through
To put it away and be able to breathe
Freely again
Don't hide from the truth
You'll have to face it anyway
You can't run from the time
Because you exist in time
As everything else
When things go bad -- do something good.

egonSchiele Offline 00

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Antw:How About Poetry???
« Reply #3413 on: November 02, 2020, 10:43:57 »
***
I recall this melody
And the crisp snow
Of November

How I was let go
To not be a burden
For he wanted to achieve great things
And with me, there were feelings --
Such a distraction
From his inner world
From the dreams of
Glory and himself being
A great lover

Greatness
I have seen so much pain
In pursuits of greatness
Inflicted to those who loved
Wanted, needed, depended on
The one
Pursuing greatness
Or living in the dream
Of one
Of how things could be
If only
All the stars aligned

I recall this melody
And the crisp snow
Of November
How I walked on it
Wondering
About the invisible soul fire
Splitting lives like a knife
Splits a rod

And somewhere there lurks a balance
A sweet spot between making things
Achieving great things
And being loved and loving
Maybe, it lies in honesty
Maybe, it hides in silence
When things go bad -- do something good.

egonSchiele Offline 00

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Antw:How About Poetry???
« Reply #3414 on: November 04, 2020, 10:43:02 »
***
I walk between the stairs
To each side
A lighted up dream
To become
Someone
With a perfect skin
A figurine
Of utmost beauty
Then you can be happy
But only then

I am also surprised to address you
I thought you were a shadow, a reflection but
I must have been closer to the truth than I wanted
To believe

How good you can be to others
And how cold and stone-hearted in your fears
To those close
Because of you I became one with those who knew
What damage to a child does to the adult
I didn't see myself then in you
I thought you were his shadow
I could never think of how things
Were truly but

I still would rather die than
Chase after glory and try being
The best in anything
I don't wonder now why
I disregard all that I achieve because
It's not a f***** shield

And I know the insecurity of me
Way too well to believe
I wouldn't cling on to this
Mirage

All these lights are a mere entourage
What does happen there
In the dark? And why do we hurt so much
Those were the reasons I asked
My billion of questions
And I will always ask
God knows I will question His Word
Or, more correct, its interpretations

My rebellious nature
I cry often, but I fight even more
When the battle is honest
I know it too well, this insidious hell
That smothers you when you did nothing
I'm also surprised the memory of you woke up
But maybe through you I can see what I cling on to
And finally could let it go

Brokenhearted people breaking the hearts of others
Doing everything to look good, does it feel good
Tell me? But I know the answer
And you would only lie to me
Maybe telling me to look at myself first
How you blamed me in your own feelings!
Doing everything to stay hidden
If it could help you be only adored
Or adorned with laurel leaves
Maybe you're back because in retrospect,
You were living by exactly what I hate
When I see in myself
Why I neurotically look into
My actions

I don't want to be like you were
To me


I walk between the stairs
To each side
A lighted up dream
To become
Someone
With a perfect skin
A figurine
Of utmost beauty
If you buy it
Become like this
You would be happy
You would be
When things go bad -- do something good.

egonSchiele Offline 00

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Antw:How About Poetry???
« Reply #3415 on: November 05, 2020, 13:57:41 »
***
In a faraway land
Of my beautiful dreams
Lived a prince

He was singing to me
Looking up at the moon
And I felt him caressing my skin

I was dreaming of him
In my castle of glass
All surrounded by mourning trees

But so little I knew
Of the demons that flew
Him away into faraway land

And I wanted to talk
And I wanted to walk
Hand in hand
In the faraway land

And I hoped if I speak
To the prince, he would sneak
Out the castle walls and pick up his sword

And he would chase away
All the demons and pain
And I would kiss away all his tears

But the years went by
And the demons grew big
And the prince... is he even alive?

He may never see me
He may never see clear
All the demons he's feeding inside

And I wanted to talk
And I wanted to walk
Hand in hand
In the faraway land

But he maybe was gone
Long before I was born
Hid away in his castle of pain

And I wanted to love
All I wanted was love
To belong
To his beautiful soul

But so little I knew
Of the demons that flew
Him away into faraway land
When things go bad -- do something good.

egonSchiele Offline 00

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Antw:How About Poetry???
« Reply #3416 on: November 06, 2020, 11:53:14 »
***
Because the mermaid dies
In the real story

She whispers quietly
Into my ear


In the true story
It was for nothing

The mermaid dies
The mermaid dies
In the real story

As Love was born from the foam
So she turned back into her form
With blood burned edges

A sea creature
Belongs to the sea
To the primordial truths
To their honesty

Because the mermaid dies
The mermaid dies
In the sea of lies
When things go bad -- do something good.

egonSchiele Offline 00

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Antw:How About Poetry???
« Reply #3417 on: November 07, 2020, 11:59:48 »
***
All these beautiful warm lights
I see in you and others
So warm, so beautiful, so pure
Shining brightly...

Surrounded by whirling cold knives of steel
So sharp, so fast
So sudden

I'd dance between the blades
To get to the warmth
But they cut for real
And I direct my own sword
At my unprotected soft
Belly

Maybe I never learn

But I don't want to have knives
Swirling around
I don't want to become hard
To add to the tally

I take a step back
You can reach out to me
If you put down your armour

I take a step back
You can dance with me
If you put down your armour
When things go bad -- do something good.

egonSchiele Offline 00

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Antw:How About Poetry???
« Reply #3418 on: November 09, 2020, 11:50:48 »
Closed protected spaces

On the ending of my childhood
I, as many before me, joined
The ones who are a part of
The closed protected spaces

I love the sea for its openness
And for the closed nature of each vessel
Such a perfect balance

On the ending of my childhood
I, as many before me, joined
The ranks of those to be brought up
As the members of future elite
If not for money, then for intellect
If not as a birthright, then for merit
Our talents were honed and directed into
The right direction, so we effortlessly flow
Into the closed protected spaces

And all sticking out was thought to die on its own
But sometimes I was asked to get rid off of it all
Because nobody could really know
How things work within me
I either was supposed to be this or that
But mostly everyone wanted me to follow
Into the closed protected spaces

Because those other people could simply kill me
Sometimes unknowingly

These days I find it a little bit funny
All the shades of elitist in those who deny elitism
Does one need to be fragile, to be honest?
Is why I shatter apiece the price I pay
To be honest with myself, to accept that I
Need the closed protected spaces?
Or even to see to which ones I belong?

Each one needs them, they sprout
Like weeds everywhere
I glided from one to another
I'm a part of this or that
But even those who many find obtuse
And lower class
Form their own elite closed spaces
To sneer at those who are accepted
Widely as of higher rank

You get so tired of that
After your tenth circle

We're only human, after all

But the worst comes from those
Who stick to their protected places
As if these are all they are or ever will be
As if a role can define a person
They hurt others like nobody else
These voluntary Cerberuses of Hell

I love the sea for its openness
And for the closed nature of each vessel
Such a perfect balance
Such pure clarity
Such justified distinction
« Last Edit: November 09, 2020, 11:54:15 by egonSchiele »
When things go bad -- do something good.

egonSchiele Offline 00

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Antw:How About Poetry???
« Reply #3419 on: November 11, 2020, 11:34:02 »
***
It was all fun
So much fun
Until it stopped being
Funny

I see so much cruelty
Hidden under your skin
Eating on you
Chaz, I miss you

I never knew
Though I must have felt it
The darkness you fought with
Pestered
With demons I'm scared even to think of

And only now I'm stable enough
To accept I lost you
Chaz

Your words were and still are
My heart pangs
Expressed in music
The agony of this confusion
Of what one is in the world of illusion
Was haunting me, too

It was all fun
So much fun
Until it wasn't

Torn apart, fears aside
I can only imagine the depth of the ravine
You held inside and were falling
Into, but still your star shone so bright

Chaz, I miss your light
When things go bad -- do something good.