Love

[Tänzerin der Dunkelheit]

Dear Lacri-family,

as Love is an important word, which can be found in lots of songs from Lacrimosa and also in our rule Love above all and because it is and should be a really significant part iof our lifes, I came up with the idea of asking you, what this means for you.

I mean, love has many different "settings":
- between lovers, of course
- between parents and a child and between siblings
- between friends
- between homosexuals
- between a lot of people who describe themselves as "polyamorous"
- between an old couple, which lives already 60 years together

...but what IS love?

How can you verify it and what does it feels like for you? And do you belive in eternal love?


Just if you want, I would be happy and I would be interested in reading what does this word means for you.

[NuWoLa]

Interesting topic.
I, personally think that love is the most powerful energy in the universe, is what keep everything working, it doesn't matter what kind of love, you can't classify it, you just feel it, it doesn't matter if you feel it for your mom, for a friend, a sister, a lover.. However, if it is true love, always will be pure and strong.. I do believe what bible says about love, the same words that we can hear in hohelied der liebe and as Tilo always says, you can't live without love, no matter what kind of love  and now I think I'm starting to blabbing so I better go xD

[Grazia]

well, in my understanding, love is a serious affair yet very simple, you either feel it or do not, and here comes all the wisdom you can find out of if - is it a thing you cannot control or does it need a hard work to keep it forever, because everything depends on  individuals, yourself and the object, the way you are and the way you can interact.
and the second point is that I believe in mother nature and think that the only real love can be between you, your children and the people who don't fuck your brain and make you risk your well-being and undergo stress, whom you are comfortable to stay with, mutual respect etc., all the other loves I consider to be an obsession or nervous disease and can be cured with one brainfuckingless dating, friending, whatever love you mean))) yes I went through this and now with a clear mind I think it was just a disease)))

well, I think all the drama and adventurous romance in 10 acts and gettings back and breakups again is beautiful, but only for art, for real life - I don't believe in this shit)))

[LadyMalina]

Thank you dear Chris for this interesting topic!
I remember there was another similar, about love, but it is sooo lovely you came the topic into live again =)

the second point is that I believe in mother nature and think that the only real love can be between you, your children and the people who don't fuck your brain and make you risk your well-being and undergo stress, whom you are comfortable to stay with, mutual respect etc., all the other loves I consider to be an obsession or nervous disease and can be cured with one brainfuckingless dating, friending, whatever love you mean))) yes I went through this and now with a clear mind I think it was just a disease)))

I am curious about this you wrote, what do you mean with "all the other loves"? ^^

Love is an universal feeling for me, and it does not understand or discriminates about people, races, religion, age and so on: anyone can feel it, no matter what and come what may.
For the different kinds of love you posted, Chris, well I usually distinguish only between the "romantic love" - this which is born between two people[woman+man, woman+woman, man+man], and the rest which can be the love you feel for your children, for your parents, siblings and the rest of members of your family, the love you feel for your friends, the love and respect you feel for animals, and also the love animals show to other animals and for people...
I think it is love after all, I mean, the love you feel for your couple is not "better" or more important/intense than the love you feel for a friend - but it is obviously different: romantic love brings other sensations.

For eternal love, yes, I think love can be eternal; maybe the love you feel for someone changes, experiments an evolution, but if you and the person you love maintain the "flame" of love, nothing can destroy it: love, as other feelngs (friendship....) needs to be cared - it is not just something you feel and you feel until is over, you have to take care of it, with words and also actions, not only let it flood your heart until the flame fades away.

Related to this: I have always heard that you only have one true love during your life: no matter if it was your first love, a love you had in the past and now you have another, but there is just one love that touches your heart so deep, so deep that you cannot forget it ever - and each person knows which is this love (obviously if they have found it). For this statement, sometimes I believe it's true but sometimes I think it is maybe overdoing, I dont know.

Another interesting topic that came to my mind, and related to this of course, is the question of what is called platonic love or platonic relationship: what do you think about it? do you think this is another kind of love or rather a fantasie, an intense feeling that can be confused with love? do you think you can fall in love with someone without knowing this someone personally?

And the last topic that came to my mind is: I have read somewhere several times that love is just chemical (I mean now the romantic love between a couple) and that when the chemical ends in some years, love is over and become other kind of less intense feelings. Do you think this is true?

[Grazia]

I am curious about this you wrote, what do you mean with "all the other loves"? ^^

i mean the types of relations between people which can be determined as brainfucking, but someone is going on to call it love, for example. A non-mutual love in a couple, real or potential, i can add here. I more and more understand that love in a couple exists only when it is mutual and this is how everything works ))) Single love is a tragedy which can be hardly called love as this is a "mutual happiness" not a suffering. I mean, for a more subjective example, I don't think one can fully experience love from a partner without a return, start feelings fade with the understanding the object treats you not like you expected, because love needs mutual development. And if there's a mental obsession the mind is not clear and one does not let this start feeling go and thinks it is a really formed love, smth like this I see)))

[Grazia]

what about these topics:

one love for a life I believe it exists and I saw many examples, like one closest - my Grandma and Grandpa. This question led me to a point if view about love I forgot to mention - some people cheat and insist they love their partners. I think it's a prior thing to consider the person you love to be the only one for the rest of life, who is getting married thinking of divorce?

Platonic love to a person you've never met I believe one can like but not love ))) but nowadays with all the videotalks I think it's easy at least to fall in love)))

sorry it's hard to use quoting with this phone 

[Fannie]

I'm agree, Love is the most powerful and wonderful feeling in the universe, that energy can achieve lots of beautiful things. I also would take Hohelied der Liebe as definition of love.
On the other hand, I think the real meaning of the word "love" has been destroying a little, because
every time there are more person that says "I love..." without feeling it.
About eternal love, I think love is eternal, is always there so is our work to let us feel it and transmit it to other persons.

[LUSha]

Talked a bit about this in German section but still its easier in English, simple and recognizable of each kind of love for me, love to my parents and grandparents are non conditional,with tolerance and sarcrifice.

Love for my friends is feeling like loving yourself and looking into my own soul, I love them as I love myself, but this is not egoismus just feel that we belong to the same type and cherish each other...both family and friend feels to me like a place to shelter when no one else understand you and turn you off, they are always there for you and you do the same for them

Love between a partner here like with my bf i feel like much sensual and also in mental a mutual support, it feels like you turned into musical instrument like a guitar and someone pulls on your string(guitar string!!) So delicate and can be so intense that both of you vibrate with beautiful music.

Despite all the good feelings I have about love, still I realize that it is a fragile emotion, triggered by certain actions with certain reasons, can last quite long but not forever, can disappear over night

So I still insist my opinion in german forum that love has little contribute to revolution., love is an unstable emotion and it is unwise to count on that.

Hmmm, interesting topic Christina. I actually had a good convo with someone ( a stranger ) about this the other day.

For me, love has many definitions or spheres:

-Romantic love (flirting)
-Actual romantic love where you would literally sacrifice anything for your partner in sickness or health. Sadly, we live in a reality often where if a beloved partner gets terminally or seriously ill.. the other one tries to leave a.s.a.p. for their own "survival." No one wants to care for anyone anymore because they want life in the fast and beautiful lane. But what about old age and when most people start to have health issues? Where is that love which holds people until they die together?

-Family love (maintaining positive bonds, attachment, nurturing and checking up on one another)

-Altruism (Love for charity and kind acts of humanity without thinking "I'm such a great person for doing this." )
-Loving thy neighbor (hardest thing to do... I don't like getting involved with my community as I am too busy and I'm a privacy nazi)
-Loving friends (checking up on them, listening to them, etc.)
-Daily friendliness and respectable manners whether it's helping someone out in need, maintaining your composure in a heated/aggressive situation or just a small favor someone asks
-Loving and RESPECTING yourself: trying not too put so much stress on yourself especially with bad substances, taking care of your health, doing pleasant things, hobbies, etc.
-Loving god (if you believe in him) and other important figures in your life (religious or not) that help you stay positive and move forward