Here I am again and ready - and willing - to say another "few words" on this topic

First of all,
Hey, why diminishing your field of study? Where this "just" came from?

I never, ever diminish it! I love it and understand all the responsibility this very field of study has before each and everyone! But you can be taught to be a good builder, or engeneer (considering a necessary application of some amount of brains, naturally

), yet you need a real vocation and LARGE amount of brain to become a physicist, for example. I know that there are exceptions, especially in our modern reality, yet still I've got a deep respect for those who are trully devoted to science.
Here I again will stand my ground
: art, actually, can be not only soothing and finding joy in itself, but it also can be disgusting, directly offensive, cruel, diminishing, discriminating - isn't it cruel? You can't hide from it either, because art is a reflection of society, it reflects on society, it is busy with society, it's an integral part of society and it serves the society, being a self-reflection of sorts - and you hardly can get away from society, because you are a mere part of it. Saying that science is cruel is the same as saying the world is cruel - if you can't get away from something, if you can't close your eyes on something - does it imply it is cruel? Art might - and might not - let you dwell in the world of make-believe, but does it make it less cruel? As with everything it seems to depend on by whom and for what purpose it is being used. Does the possibility of closing your eyes onto what pains you the most make it less painful, make it less cruel, if cruel it is? No. But by watching it you can find a way to fix it - or perhaps find that your thinking was wrong - albeit sometimes being painful, this process has nothing to do with cruelty.
Art gives you the right to find soothing- I just can't get this phrase. Can it be rephrased into Society gives you right to find soothing in art? Because art the way it is is no authority, the way I see it, at least, since it needs to be understood and decoded before actually "speaking".
I will stand on my ground, too.
Art gives you the right to find soothing!And it is not cruell. Not in itself, no. And not only in a make-believe world. You see, naturally, art does reflect our society. "We get those classics whom we want and sometimes those whom we deserve". I can't remember whose words these ones are, and I'm afraid that the quotation is incorrect. Yet still... So, art reflects everything what takes place in our society, without any doubt. But you CAN close your eyes on it. Yes, there are plenty of examples of disgusting, offensive, diminishing - whatever else? art - but does it actually influence you? I for one belong to those who have a certain academic interest in new tendencies in art, but will never return to the works of authors (artists, musicians...) which I don't like. Yes, they do not cease to exist because of my dislike - and why should they? If there is a book, a painting, a melody... there obviously are those who respond to its appeal. But in art you can choose and without any pain, actually. Why? Why should anyone try to fix anything he/she doesn't like at all? Is it to find out why somebody claims it to be a true piece of art? Well, here let me give you an example of Surrealism. Sometimes there are no sense at all in what some consider to be the very depth of wisdom and truth

And there are many a process in society which doesn't concern us at all. You simply can't care for everything
While, being
a ... part of society you without any doubt can't turn your back on this society. And the same with science - however stubbornly you close your eyes on any law of nature, it EXISTS AND HAS ITS INFLUENCE.
Just a small example: physical and chemical processes taking place on atomic power plants. For me as well as for millions and millions people they are like parallel plane, too. We do not see all the depth of these processes and - strictly speaking - do not care for them. Yet, in 1986 all the world was obliged to recognize all the severity of consequences of these processes - or, it's better to say, of the loss of control over them. While no piece of art will ever intrude your life with such a cruelty.
Art gives you the right to find soothingHere we get to the very beginning.
What art is for you? And for you personnaly?
For me ART IS AN AUTHORITY. I do not mean the way of creation, but I mean the result. It's not for society to decide what gives me soothing. It's not for society to decide where I find the answers for my questions. But art - if you take it not like a field of science, but like something lying in a parallel plane, something existing according to its own laws, something not rational and often spontaneous - gives you a lot, if you are ready to comprehend, if you are ready to understand. And here it is: it's for art to propose and for you to respond.
Lacrimosa once gave me more than all the books and studies I had had in my life. It was like a missing part of a whole which put everything to its right place. So was it society which allowed me to find this last part of a puzzle?
Sadly [or happily?
] I'm far from being an expert in the field of love, yet however categorical I may sound my statement is actually based on scientific research I've been reading these last years. In the bonds of patriarchy women did not choose their husbands as such - they were given away, and treated as workforce in the first place, rather than a woman as we now - in most countries - are blessed to perceive, with our freedom, however limited it still might be, at least in certain spheres, and laws standing behind us, even if not fully and not always. They had none of it. "If he beats you - he loves you", ha?.. By the word "love" I think people normally mean something else than Stockholm Syndrome. Brrrr, I still shiver upon recalling the things I read. Makes my soul bleed terribly.
And as for privileged classes... I can't speak for really high circles, since I do not descend from any, but when my grand-grandparent married outside his class of merchants he and his family were ostracised, yet nobody was killed or thrown out (well... almost thrown out xD but - he chose love rather than class, after all... and, actually, I'm proud of his choice), or beaten to death, or.... shall I continue?..
And, also, higher circles had more horizontal - and even vertical - mobility, thus being able to find ways of dealing with "parental wish" for their marriage.
Oh, well, you already know my point of view on this question!
I don't doubt the authority of the research you've read. I've seen quite a few of them myself

I'll tell you just this: the further the history (from our time, I mean), the more imprecise science it becomes. But, still being a science, it never takes the sphere of feelings into account. It just states. So no research will ever tell you if there existed love between such forced couples or they were obliged to co-exist.
Yes, the rights of women were poor. And
never seldom they were asked their opinion on their future. And too often they were given to their husbands like some goods in a shop. But - I still insist - this does not mean that there existed no love in those time. However - yes, you will find no trace of it in no textbook, or scientific research.

And there were not many examples like that of your grandparent of those who were ready to refuse all they had for love

My words are not bare. I've studied the history of my country but tried to find not only an "academic" version of it, but also a "folklore" one - from those who still remember it. And I do doubt that traditions of our countries differ a lot.

By the way, is not the statement "If he beats you - he loves you" palpitant in our days, too? Have you never met such examples in our contemporary society?..
Haha, I guess here we're well too much alike, I also write what seems to be full-fledged treatises xD I sincerely hope I don't sound snotty or something - at times I know I might sound like this, yet it is far from how I view things (and feel while writing them).
Oh, no, in no way!
And I'd like to thank you for such a really interesting topic!
Well, let it be just a dialogue, actually (
although I still hope that anyone will join it), this discussion is a real pleasure to me!