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Off-Topic / Antw:How About Poetry???
« Last post by egonSchiele on Yesterday at 20:00:39 »
***
Looking at myself
I wonder

Could I be
Someone else
Could I be to them
Those I wanted to love
What they wanted to love?

To love as to be with
Not to love as to feel
The joy of the feeling

To love as in walk together
Through the good and the bad
Not to wait till I get
How to make them happy

To love as to compose
The dance of events
Into a joined jump
Into the shared future
Not as a dream to dream
When there's no one else
To fall in love with

Looking at myself
I wonder
If I could bear
Enhancing myself
In specific ways
Would I be able to make them change
How they were to me?

I must acquiesce
Succumb to reality
Dance
Through the pain
Do
What I was born to

Looking at myself
I wonder
Was there really anything
Was there any hope at all

Could I become
Someone else
Could I read their thoughts
Could I create ideal worlds
For them

To soothe their pain
To calm my heartache

I wish I could recompense
Erase the pain they had
That made them hide away
Into their cold shells

But don't I wish it
So they could love
Love me as I were and am?

Looking at myself
I wonder
Was there really anything
Was there any hope at all

Or was it all chosen
Before I came
Into being
3
Off-Topic / Antw:How About Poetry???
« Last post by egonSchiele on October 06, 2020, 14:20:27 »
***
Stories
Of falling leaves
Are being told
In sweet whisperings
Of October wind

Each step I take
In whichever direction
Propels me
Forward in time

Stories
Of colorful droplets
Splash
Into puddles
On the grey
Asphalt

Time moves
In one breath with
The flitting birds
In the trembling sky
Of Autumn
4
Off-Topic / Antw:How About Poetry???
« Last post by Kitty on October 06, 2020, 13:15:11 »
Fog bewitches my heart
the colorful happiness driven out
maybe it's autumn
grey mood for grey days
we both know it isn't
something inside me broke
long before I was aware I was someone
I don't know how to get out
grasping every hand that tries to pull me
yet never strong enough to hold on
you guided me a long way
your eyes made me awake
something inside me lit up the day we met
recognition from a former life
gone with a snap
what we built in years broke down in seconds
what matters is gone
what I feared came true
what got broken never healed
seconds got minutes into years
and in my heart I know
you let go off me.

5
Off-Topic / Antw:How About Poetry???
« Last post by egonSchiele on October 02, 2020, 12:17:53 »
***
Step into the fire,
Burn


Will I swirl up
In a cloud of ashes?

Ashes to ashes
Dust to dust


I wanted to believe
In your words
I wanted to trust
It was love

I step into the fire
To burn

Like a witch
Blameless, too

That little girl
She is standing there
Begging
Love me
Hug me
Notice me


Everyone says you love me
You yourself hurt me if I dare
Saying
How lonely I feel

I step into the fire
To burn
Let the flame lick away
The nerves off my skeleton

Numb like ice
It's a river you cannot cross twice

Be with me
I only wanted someone
To be with me
But I chose them
After you
Mom
Dad

Unavoidable error
Inescapable hell
To want to get close to those who
Really want to be
On their own

I can see it now
I cry my heart out
I can see it now

I can see it now
So I step into the fire
Alone
6
Off-Topic / Antw:How About Poetry???
« Last post by egonSchiele on September 29, 2020, 12:42:01 »
***
I let the fog
Stream and swirl
Into my warm soul

Let it be cold
Let my heart cool
Down
Let my face be bitten
By the frost
Let the tears
Freeze
Let me be lost
In the mist

I grieve
I see what you don't want to see
Blame me
I'm used to
Being blamed
For feeling hurt

I let the wind
Scream and scowl
Breaking the shawl
Of my messed up hair
Into wavy strands

Your hand doesn't touch it anyway

Only loneliness can be safely predicted
Is it what sets aside true love from a trauma bond?
Is it me despairing before it's all done?
Or is it me hearing my own pain
In my own heart?

So many things I shared
I regret their heaviness
I mouth into the fog that I love you
Even though I see your lips forming other words
Instead

I let the fog
Stream and swirl
Into my warm soul

Let it be cold
Let my heart cool
Down
Let my face be bitten
By the frost
Let the tears
Freeze
Let me be lost
In the mist

Let me disappear
So you breathe with ease
If this is
What you want
I'm used to
Freeing up space
To be occupied by those
Who would be loved

I never asked to be born
To those who couldn't love me
I was searching for a warm home
In the ways I could
I was looking for love
How I were taught love could look

I let the cold wind take my soul
Maybe, I'm not human after all
A sea creature, a fanthom
You can treat me mercilessly
Water does not hurt
Isn't supposed to
Feel hurt
Shouldn't want
A kind word
The warmth of a caressing hand
Shouldn't want
To feel loved
Shouldn't expect
To be informed
Of anything
Shouldn't have
Her worries
Dissipate

But what if
I am just
A human?

What if
I'm just a
Lost traumatized woman?

What if
I just
Want to love and be loved?
7
Off-Topic / Antw:How About Poetry???
« Last post by Kitty on September 29, 2020, 12:26:13 »
It's hard to accept love has died on its way
I had a strong believe that it could never fall apart
waking up, knowing the knife stabbed too hard this time
I thought you would be forever by my side
I guess I loved the calmness you created
to lay down in your arms unaware of the cruels in life
yet this time I know I'll wake up all alone in my nightmare.

It's hard to accept friendship lasts only as long as it takes
it takes to build up and it breaks down in nothingness
waking up, strolling through memorylane  of your heart touching mine
I thought we'd be forever one team pushing further to grow
I guess I loved the softness of your voice
carressing a bleeding soul to get up and move on
yet this time I'm afraid, I'll wake up in no time, without you by my side.

It's hard to accept what we had was crushed underneath
all the obstacles gathering, no more time wasted memories
waking up, tearful hurt crushed my heart, kept inside
I thought silence would grow out and time would guide
I guess I trusted too much upon your radiant soul
sending light enrolled melodies around
yet this time, I wake up by myself, it's too late.
8
Off-Topic / Antw:Now and next Playing/What are you listen
« Last post by Kitty on September 29, 2020, 12:13:41 »
now: Someone you loved - lewis Capaldi

Now the day bleeds
Into nightfall
And you're not here
To get me through it all
I let my guard down
And then you pulled the rug
I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved

I guess I kinda liked the way you helped me escape
9
Deutsches Unterforum / Antw:T-Shirt vom Konzert 28.08.2020 worldwidelife
« Last post by Kitty on September 29, 2020, 12:05:00 »
Hallo Ralf,

Ich weiss nicht ob du dein T-shirt in der Zwischenzeit schon erhalten hast.
Wenn ich mich nicht irre wurde der Versendung etwa halb September anfangen. Ich hatte Masken bestellt und die wurden hier inzwischen geliefert Ende letzter Woche (Donnerstag oder Freitag). Ich wohne selbst in Belgien, weiss nicht woher du kommst. Hast du inzwischen einem Versandtbericht erhalten? Du kannst dich diesbezüglich auch melden bei Hall Of Sermon Shop https://www.hos-shop.com/Contact sie werden dich da bestimmt weiter helfen.

Liebe Grüsse
Kitty
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Off-Topic / Antw:How About Poetry???
« Last post by egonSchiele on September 27, 2020, 17:09:33 »
***
I wanted
To bring you
Dreams and rainbows

I wanted you
To catch me
On that colorful bridge
The mystery
Of heavens

I wanted
To hear
How your heart beats
In solitude

Were those lies
I wasn't aware of
Or were these building blocs
Too heavy for my tiny hands

Or did I need you
To help me
Build this bridge?

Questions swirl
Falling down like leaves
They stick to the streams
Of tears
Down the drain of time

In your universe you are immortal
Immune to the passage of time
And its bothers

So am I in mine

So am I in mine

But only the time itself is real

I wanted
To bring you
Dreams and rainbows

I ended up
Hiding in shame
Of and from
Myself
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