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MEINE WELT - the Lacrimosa community => Off-Topic => Topic started by: MyleneMaelinhon on September 03, 2013, 04:35:13

Title: Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: MyleneMaelinhon on September 03, 2013, 04:35:13
Hello world
Wanna share my butthurt.   >:(
Im a writer, working on my 4th book now, and I desided to place a photo of Tilo's hands in it (depending on its main topic). I dont see anything rude in it, so I decided to contact Tilo and simply ask about it. I mean photo and his thoughts about this strange ask.
So, I wrote on HoS email address, which placed in here as a contact "for any questions".
My letter was polite and short. Any asks about personal info or smth.

In 4 days I got a very strange and a bit offensive answer :| Some guy from studio (not Tilo) answered in "bot style", that he wont even pass my ask to Tilo, cause "he doesnt share any personal info about him"... Im sorry... good luck... go to hell with your fan's snots
Means HE himself decided everything about it.
It looked like prepared answer to 1000 letters, which noone read at all.

How the hell should I react on it?... What "intimate and personal" should be in such a photo? Not more intimate than his face.
Of course I can place some other hands there, it will be published in spring anyway. But Im very very piqued about.  :'( Cause that was planned as a kind of respect symbol and smth pleasant. I think every person could feel pleasant if someone devote them a book or its part, isnt it?...
I mean is it normal practice for Lacrimosa, or Im just very "lucky"?...







Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: Asphodel on September 03, 2013, 08:02:18
Quote
Some guy from studio (not Tilo) answered in "bot style"

That is right, Tilo doesn't answer the emails to HoS,  at least I haven't heard about it, the emails are answered by other HoS workers.

As for the refusal that you got - I from my place won't judge anyone, I don't know their reasons for doing so. (Maybe for example they understood you wrong thinking that you are asking them to make such photo specially for you, I don't know.) It's a pity that your plans are changed that way and you got offended by it...
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: Grazia on September 03, 2013, 08:26:22
It's a pity you have no way to ask Tilo, he might have appreciated this great idea, or may be you wish to use an exact photo which has an author who need to be asked too?
Anyways it's their right to decline, or else why do we ask for it. Sorry for your negative experience.
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: Mozart on September 03, 2013, 13:45:02
I could borrow you my profile picture, it's Tilo's hand but the rights are mine 8) so you can publish it and give me the credit ;D

No, I am really sorry about this bad experience you were through! I think you should talk directly to M├Ątze, who is for me the most indicated to this matters, at least I think so, and maybe you don't need to change your plan, that is actually a very well intentioned plan! :) good luck.
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: WalkAbout on September 03, 2013, 16:38:40
I suppose if your book is going to be published in the spring, you should ask your agent in chief in the publishing house who is responsible for the publication to contact HoS on your behalf, listing his/her and your credentials. Thus it would be more evident for both sides what exactly you want and how HoS can be (if that is possible) of any help. Btw, which publishing house that would be and why it is you, an author, who has to deal with it on your own? Actually it seems exceptional to me, because authors I know were complaining to me that they don't have a final word on the subject of cover or pictures (except professional photographers and painters, of course), because publishing houses have marketing experts who, together with designers, choose the final look of books.

I seems like there is some misunderstanding that should be cleared. I'm sure that HoS workers didn't intend to be offensive. Based on my experience correspondence with HoS is always par excellence, and people working there are always helpful and polite.
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: Tajj on September 03, 2013, 17:10:15
Hello Mylene :)
I'm sorry that you have had these unpleasant moments. Maybe a few words of explanation will help you to not react as tough.

First of all you should not be upset because of no personal response from Tilo Wolff. Tilo never responds personally to any letters, that's true. But that don't mean he does not know about your question. As I know he is always aware of everything that happens in his company  ;)

Second moment: Tilo Wolff really very cares about his private life and he always tries to avoid publishing any private information about him that is not directly related to his music. So I think he could be alarmed of the content of your work. It's not just a fan's photos, isn't it? ;))  And third, as you know, Tilo Wolff is a very religious person and he probably just ddoesn't pprove of the occult disciplines. Possibly it could also be the cause of his ban. In any case, don't take this answer as a personal aggression against you. I'm sure that employees of HoS didn't mean that at all. :)
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: Kitty on September 03, 2013, 17:37:20
Sorry to read about your sorrow... I can't really advice you anything seeing I have no insight in the why...but to stay calm and polite, maybe there truly was a misunderstanding or else you'll really have to accept...you can always verify politely and calm whether there was misunderstanding...know that they get dozens of emails every day, it's probably not always equally easy to deal with the load hence I do think that your publisher might make a more official state... Don't be angry not with Hos nor with Tilo...I beg you :-)
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: MyleneMaelinhon on September 03, 2013, 17:41:36
Hello Mylene,
I am sorry to tell you that the answer is 'no'. Tilo Wolff is not into a project which is not connected with the music and is only about the person himself.
With kind regards
Dominik Regner


*depress* Its strange, cause I got few positive answers from other famous guys.
I have few samples of Tilo's hands, made by me during concerts in my city, but I think I wont use it with no approving.  Anyway, Ill dedicate my book to Tilo. -_____- I mean write a dedication in the beginning.
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: A Elena on September 03, 2013, 18:27:06
Hi, Mylene!

I'm very sorry to read about your sadness! I read the answer you've received...and I think you should try again. The answer is not offensive at all, in my opinion, and maybe you should make your future request more official, giving details about the book and about your intentions. I hope you'll get the answer you are dreaming at, and if not, I hope you'll understand Tilo Wolff's decision. Good luck!
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: MyleneMaelinhon on September 03, 2013, 21:25:12
A Elena

Thats the answer #2 I got today
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: LadyMalina on September 03, 2013, 21:49:46
Hello Mylene!
I am so sorry you got a "no" from answer but I think what Nina proponed sounds quite intelligent....you could say to your publising house that they could maybe give a try and ask in your name. Maybe this way is safer for them :).
Good luck!!!!!!!!
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: LUSha on September 03, 2013, 22:00:03
Mylene..even im sorry for your plan...but i think you feel hurted is probably you were not prepared to be rejected...and this reject (actually any reject they make)  should not be taken offensive, they have their concerns, besides every company, big or small have their "Hausordnung....general rules as common sense which staff stick to without having to confirm with boss everytime, I guess it can be the case, and I agree with Nina, your publisher should arrange official contact,  ...and even when you arranged everything they can still say no, they have right to decide what they want what they dont, just like everyone has. So i think they can reject your or my or our requests even without reasons, I don't find it offensive, they have right to say no..
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: Fannie on September 04, 2013, 00:03:02
Hi Mylene!
I'm so sorry to read about this umpleasant answer, I really liked your idea  :) But I think they didn't accept and take it as a personal stuff because you mentioned just Tilo's name and not Lacrimosa... Anyway you should try to get a more official contact as Nina said! Btw, write a dedication to Tilo seems to be a good idea! ;) Don't give up!!! and don't feel sad! I wish you good luck! ;D
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: Lorena_89 on September 04, 2013, 00:35:09
Hello Mylene!

Terrible to read the 'no' from HoS people. I will tell you by my own experiences, I'm into P.R & marketing also I've been 'assistant' (I often reply mails in name of some under bands) and also helping with press of my fave singer, but it's just a 'hobby' - People who work in such big companies, are kinda 'pushed' to take all the proposals just if they are presented as formal. It has to be a mail or letter, first introducing yourself, then explaining what you want to do, after you explain that, you should express the aim, and why did you choose Tilo to do that. You have to 'be seen' as a writer, not as a fan. I suggest you, to write again a mail to HoS with the tips we all have given to you, and if you have professional sites on the net, add them on the mail/letter - Press people need to read you're a professional, if you are a fan or not, it's another topic. Don't take their answer as disrespectful, they have to do a though job and even more with an artist like Tilo. Give it a second chance, I'm sure their assistants, didn't get the real meaning of your work. If you need more tips, or whatever, just contact us, we are all to help each other =)
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: MyleneMaelinhon on September 04, 2013, 00:43:41
Well, nice thought, but not in my case. I collaborate with publishing house Veligor (Moscow). Im not sure they do such things at all, cause they rarely take part in material picking or smth like that. Their specific of working. They are more helpfull about selling, promoting...

And I think its kind a... disagreeably, to act like that.  Its personal for ME in this case.
I mean, I was always feel very thankfull  to my fav singers and writers,  kind of "warmed" with their art and inspired to my own one. I rarely write such things to celebrities, so, if I though decide to make them know about me and my work, it should be a conversation or, at least, they will read my letter themselves.

Not like if Id want to get some certificate and coldly "ask my lawer to get it", in official tone and words, and "their lawer do it".
If you know what Im trying to say :)

The book is same as your child, in feelings. Its a long and hard work, when you need a power, and inspiration, and after 6-8 monthes, when you finally write the end, you feel REALLY very thankfull to everyone who helped you. To friends, to helpers, to musicians who you were listen to during the work...
So, if you decide to dedicate it somebody, it means you are REALLY grateful to  this person. :) Who dafaq will pass "the child" through some strange guy, who even dont read my letter?
So, if I will make this dedication and use picture in my work, Id like to hear Tilo's own opinion.
Cause may be he will refuse it, its his right, huh?  :) Id accept it anyway





Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: Lorena_89 on September 04, 2013, 01:16:54
Ok, I'm starting to get your point, so you want Tilo to read your book. But you don't want to send it to some random assistant, you want just Tilo to read it, or I am wrong?? It's something personal of course. I got it.

Yes I understand, but sometimes It's not that easy to reach some artists. But you should write what you are writting here on a mail, maybe it will work, if not, at least you tried it. It's weird Tilo to refuse it like that, but yeah we all have right to don't want to do something, of course.
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: MyleneMaelinhon on September 04, 2013, 01:30:30
Noooo... The book is not ready now and Im not sure he will be interested in anyway. It has pretty specific topic and idea.
I meant that I wanna get a photo of his palms in good quality and place it in book, among other artists I asked it about (got 3 positive answers at the moment).
And write a dedication to him in the beginning.

I dont want him to read it, or contact me, or smth..  But I cant just place the photo with no approval. And I have no one in good quality
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: Lorena_89 on September 04, 2013, 02:01:25
Oh man it's not such a big deal, I mean, it's clear now for me what you want, and I think people from HoS didn't get the point. Because it's not something weird, or so, it's just an 'ok' for a picture in a good quality.
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: MyleneMaelinhon on September 04, 2013, 14:33:24
So thats why am I angry!
Cause its not something like "give me his naked photo"  ;D I thinks hands are not so intimate...
Anyway Ill write a dedication.  :'(
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: Tajj on September 04, 2013, 15:55:25
So thats why am I angry!
Cause its not something like "give me his naked photo"  ;D I thinks hands are not so intimate...
Anyway Ill write a dedication.  :'(
Mmm... Mylene, no matter what the reasons Tilo has for the refusal at your request, he has the right to say "no." I think it makes no sense to insist on. He don't want to and that's enough reason if he's really your favorite artiste, as you say, and if you really respect him. Possible you could pay attention to other celebrities who are more loyal to your work and are willing to cooperate.
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: WalkAbout on September 04, 2013, 16:09:13
So thats why am I angry!
Cause its not something like "give me his naked photo"  ;D I thinks hands are not so intimate...
Anyway Ill write a dedication.  :'(
I can't understand you. I truly tried but I can't. Do you respect Tilo? If you do, then you can't be angry with his decision.  Because it is his decision. If you love someone, or like someone, or simply respect someone it's automatic that you respect all decisions of this person, no matter how much they hurt you. Sorry for a mentor-like tone, but...
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: Keineangst on September 04, 2013, 17:24:31
So thats why am I angry!
Cause its not something like "give me his naked photo"  ;D I thinks hands are not so intimate...
Anyway Ill write a dedication.  :'(

Hi Mylene. I just wanted to say that while I understand your desire of having a physical part of Tilo as a part of the presentation of your book, I really think you should try to see this issue from Tilo's perspective and try to not be angry about it. If Tilo means so much to you, you probably agree with most things he says and so his line of reasoning might be something you respect and trust. Therefore, you should keep in mind that he has analyzed your problem and reached the conclusion that it might not be good for him to do this. I agree with you, his hands are not an intimate part, but there might be many more implications to your request than just letting you take a picture of his hands.

Anyway, you should try to keep in mind that, as some people already stated, although he doesn't answer the e-mails personally, he actually makes the decisitions, so what the people at HoS told you is the message Tilo gave you (maybe not using the artistry of Tilo himself, but it really should contain the gist of Tilo's message).

I really wish you lots of luck with your book and I hope that you can avoid resenting Tilo for this inconvenience. Try to have happy thoughts! :) :) :) *Good vibes to you*



Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: A Elena on September 04, 2013, 17:32:08
So thats why am I angry!
Cause its not something like "give me his naked photo"  ;D I thinks hands are not so intimate...
Anyway Ill write a dedication.  :'(

Oh, try to understand his decision..., and don't be angry, please!!!
The fact that you'll write a dedication for him anyway, this is so touching and beautiful!!! This is true admiration, respect and love!!!
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: Lorena_89 on September 05, 2013, 00:05:27
Folks, if Tilo can say NO, and everybody agrees he has the right to deny it, and blablah (which is true) let's Mylene to be angry, because the writer, has also right to be angry let's be more objective. Just saying ;)
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: Grazia on September 05, 2013, 07:26:06
Folks, if Tilo can say NO, and everybody agrees he has the right to deny it, and blablah (which is true) let's Mylene to be angry, because the writer, has also right to be angry let's be more objective. Just saying ;)

from this point of view, it happens that everyone also has the right to ask Mylene not to be angry, anger is a bad, destroying feeling and we too have the right not to tolerate it, and if one needs support and cooperation, he/she should be ready for compromise and understanding. Being objective is such a thing that needs strict borders...Or else it leads to nothing but total disorder and bitching to each other. There's nothing bad in supporting people in getting peace in mind, better than letting them go on falling into darkness  ;)
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: LadyMalina on September 05, 2013, 09:02:43
Folks, if Tilo can say NO, and everybody agrees he has the right to deny it, and blablah (which is true) let's Mylene to be angry, because the writer, has also right to be angry let's be more objective. Just saying ;)

Here I agree with Lorena, she has the right to be angry, as long as she does not disrespect anyone here in the forum. Nobody here knows what this issue means for her, and we can just support her with advices if we are concerned, or ignore her matter, but in the end she will be the one deciding how she feels, bearing in mind that respect is importan,t no matter how angry you are. Angriness is an human emotion and everybody feels it from time to time. Restraining emotions by not tolerating them does not help either.
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: A Elena on September 05, 2013, 11:19:36
Dear girls, of course Mylene has the right to be angry, or to experience any other kind of feelings and emotions. This is beyond any question! And, to speak only for myself, my intention was only to comfort her sad soul!   :)
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: Kitty on September 06, 2013, 23:01:57
I think you've got every right to be angry, out of the question! The question is whether it'll bring you anything? Does it make you feel happier? Does it make you get what you want? Does it feel good?... Anger usually derives from a hurt ego (I mock my ego mostly in that I tell it to stop acting like a child that doesn't get his loly...) and I believe that self is necessary but ego a pain in the ass (so actually something we should try to avoid of getting the upper hand) ... I can understand your disappointment, absolutely!, you wished it badly that they would say yes, and in the end they said no... but try this: you have a choice on how to feel under this disappointment eventhough you might at this point while reading this think you haven't... you do... And I do think that if you listen to what your love for Lacrimosa and Tilo tells you, your anger will disappear in no time and you'll look upon it with understanding,cause your anger does not arrive from the love for Lacrimosa does it? Your anger derives from the believe you need a specific thing to express this love and now don't get this chance... but love is all-around and felt even without spoken words, you don't need this to prove your love/gratitude and belief in this awesome band and great human being.  I beg you to not take those words too personal, they're not at all meant to hurt you, that's something I'm 100% certain off!!!! And they're not meant offensive or denigrating! I send you a very big hug with loads of positiveness!! :)

Please, love each other :) life's too short to waste it on fights of the ego...
Title: Antw:Unpleasant answer from Hall of Sermon
Post by: MyleneMaelinhon on September 07, 2013, 00:38:05
U know, the main problem is that Im absolutely not sure that my ask was really passed to Tilo :\
So Im thinkimg about contacing in some other way.
Or, may be, contact other band members